How to get rid of them pesky fruit flies:
Ms Julie’s Cootie Catcher*
Well, ya can try swattin’em but yer most likely just gonna pull somethin’. Ya can try sprayin’ but yer probably just gonna choke the mule. So, here’s a simple, cheap and effective way to git rid of them pesky buggers. Yeah, it really is this easy and really works!
1. Next time ya finish a jar of moonshine, fill about a quarter of the jar with APPLE CIDER VINEGAR.
2. Roll a piece of paper into a cone (make sure ya got about a penny size opening on the skinny end).
3. Place the cone in the jar (make sure the cone ain’t dippin’ into the vinegar).
4. Place the jar by yer fruits and vegetables (the eatin’ kind, not yer cousins).
That’s it. The flies like that vinegar and will crawl down the cone, into the jar, and can’t get out! After ya caught yerself a mess of flies, carry the jar outside, pull out the cone and release’em back into the wild (just make sure ya closed the door so they don’t go back inside).
Oh, make sure ya change the vinegar every day or two ta keep it fresh and fruity.
*Cooties may very by State. Not guaranteed to work on Boy Cooties, Girl Cooties, Bed Cooties, Couch Cooties, Shoe Cooties, or Cooties that enter the USA in foreign packing crates. Use only as directed. Member FDIC.